晨韵推荐：双语美文--哈利波特与凤凰社 Chapter 10（下）

绚斓晨韵

'Yeah, right, because Malfoy won't abuse it at all,' said Ron sarcastically.
'So you're going to descend to his level？'
'No, I'm just going to make sure I get his mates before he gets mine.'
'For heavens sake, Ron - '
'I'll make Goyle do lines, it'll kill him, he hates writing,' said Ron happily. He lowered his voice to Goyle's low grunt and, screwing up his face in a look of pained concentration, mimed writing in midair. 'I . . . must. . . not. . . look . . .like . . . a . . . baboon's . . . backside.'
Everyone laughed, but nobody laughed harder than Luna Lovegood. She let out a scream of mirth that caused Hedwig to wake up and flap her wings indignantly and Crookshanks to leap up into the luggage rack, hissing. Luna laughed so hard her magazine slipped out of her grasp, slid down her legs and on to the floor.
'That was funny！'
Her prominent eyes swam with tears as she gasped for breath, staring at Ron. Utterly nonplussed, he looked around at the others, who were now laughing at the expression on Ron's face and at the ludicrously prolonged laughter of Luna Lovegood, who was rocking backwards and forwards, clutching her sides.
“是啊，没错，因为马尔福是绝不会滥用职权的。”罗恩讽刺地说。
“这么说你要把自己降低到他那个层次？”
“不——我只是要保证在他欺负我的朋友之前，先给他的朋友一点儿厉害瞧瞧。”
“看在老天的分儿上，罗恩——”
“我要罚高尔写句子，那会要了他的命，他最讨厌写字了。”罗恩开心地说道。他放低声音，学着高尔粗声哑气的嗓音，把脸皱成一团，似乎在痛苦地集中注意力，假装在空气中写字：“我……绝……不……能……像……狒……狒……的……屁……股。”
大伙儿乐得哈哈大笑，但是谁也没有卢娜·洛夫古德笑得那样厉害。她发出一串尖厉刺耳的狂笑，把海德薇从梦中惊醒了。它愤怒地扑扇着翅膀，吓得克鲁克山跳到行李架上，嘶嘶地叫着。卢娜笑得太厉害了，她手里的杂志掉下来，从腿上滑到了地板上。
“太好玩了！”
她急促地喘着气，一个劲儿地瞪着罗恩，两只凸出的眼里涌满了泪水。罗恩完全摸不着头脑，他疑惑地望望大家，而他们都被罗恩脸上的表情，还有卢娜·洛夫古德那没完没了的狂笑逗得开怀大笑。卢娜拼命捂着肚子，笑得前仰后合。
'Are you taking the mickey？' said Ron, frowning at her.
'Baboon's . . . backside！' she choked, holding her ribs.
Everyone else was watching Luna laughing, but Harry, glancing at the magazine on the floor, noticed something that made him dive for it. Upside-down it had been hard to tell what the picture on the front was, but Harry now realised i！ was a fairly bad cartoon of Cornelius Fudge; Harry only recognised him because of the lime-green bowler hat. One of Fudges hands was clenched around a bag of gold; the other hand was throttling a goblin. The cartoon was captioned: How Far Will Fudge Go to Gain Gringotts？
Beneath this were listed the titles of other articles inside the magazine.
Corruption in the Quidditch League:
How the Tornados are Taking Control
Secrets of the Ancient Runes Revealed
Sirius Black: Villain or Victim？
“你在嘲笑我吗？”罗恩冲她皱着眉头问道。
“狒狒的……屁股！”她按住胸口，气喘吁吁地说。
其他人都在看卢娜狂笑，哈利却扫了一眼地上的那本杂志，突然注意到了什么，便伸手把杂志捡了起来。刚才颠倒着不容易看清封面上的图画，现在哈利才看出那原来是一幅画得很糟糕的康奈利·福吉的漫画，哈利是由他头上那顶暗黄绿色的帽子认出他来的。福吉的一只手抓住一袋金子，另一只手掐着一个妖精的脖子。漫画上的说明文字是：福吉离霸占古灵阁还有多远？
紧接着下面列出了杂志里其他文章的标题：
魁地奇球俱乐部联合会里的腐败
龙卷风如何任意肆虐
古魔文揭秘
小天狼星布莱克：恶棍还是受害者？
'Can I have a look at this？' Harry asked Luna eagerly.
She nodded, still gazing at Ron, breathless with laughter.
Harry opened the magazine and scanned the index. Until this moment he had completely forgotten the magazine Kingsley had handed Mr Weasley to give to Sirius, but it must have been this edition of The Quibbler.
He found the page, and turned excitedly to the article.
This, too, was illustrated by a rather bad cartoon; in fact, Harry would not have known it was supposed to be Sirius if it hadn't been captioned. Sirius was standing on a pile of human bones with his wand out. The headline on the article said:
SIRIUS - BLACK AS HE'S PAINTED？
Notorious mass murderer or innocent singing sensation？
Harry had to read this first sentence several times before he was convinced that he had not misunderstood it. Since when had Sirius been a singing sensation？
“可以给我看看吗？”哈利急切地问卢娜。
她点点头，眼睛仍然盯着罗恩，笑得连气儿都喘不上来了。
哈利打开杂志，扫了一眼目录。他已经把金斯莱委托韦斯莱先生转交给小天狼星的那本杂志忘了个一干二净，直到这会儿才又想起来，看来那肯定就是这期的《唱唱反调》。
他找到页码，迫不及待地翻到那篇文章。
这一页也有一幅画得非常糟糕的漫画。实际上，如果没有说明文字，哈利简直认不出这个人就是小天狼星。画上的小天狼星站在一堆白骨上面，手里举着魔杖，文章的标题是：
小天狼星——像画上这么黑吗？④
臭名昭著的杀人魔王还是无辜的歌坛巨星？
哈利把这个句子读了好几遍，才确信自己没有弄错它的意思。小天狼星什么时候成了一个歌坛巨星？
For fourteen years Sirius Black has been believed guilty of the mass murder of twelve innocent Muggles and one wizard. Black's audacious escape from Azkaban two years ago has led to the widest manhunt ever conducted by the Ministry of Magic. None of us has ever questioned that he deserves to be recaptured and handed back to the Dementors.
BUT DOES HE？
Startling new evidence has recently come to light that Sirius Black may not have committed the crimes for which he was sent to Azhaban. In fact, says Doris Purkiss, of 18 Acanthia Way, Little Norton, Black may not even have been present at the killings.
'What people don't realise is that Sirius Black is a false name,' says Mrs Purkiss. 'The man people believe to be Sirius Black is actually Stubby Boardman, lead singer of popular singing group The Hobgoblins, who retired from public life after being struck on the ear by a turnip at a concert in Little Norton Church Hall nearly fifteen years ago. I recognised him the moment I saw his picture in the paper. Now, Stubby couldn't possibly have committed those crimes, because on the day in question he happened to be enjoying a romantic candlelit dinner with me. I have written to the Minister for Magic and am expecting him to give Stubby, alias Sirius, a full pardon any day now.'
Harry finished reading and stared at the page in disbelief. Perhaps it was a joke, he thought, perhaps the magazine often printed spoof items. He flicked back a few pages and found the piece on Fudge.
Cornelius Fudge, the Minister for Magic, denied that he had any plans to take over the running of the Wizarding Bank, Gringotts, when he was elected Minister for Magic jive years ago. Fudge has always insisted that he wants nothing more than to 'co-operate peacefully' with the guardians of our gold.
BUT DOES HE？
十四年来，小天狼星布莱克一直被认为是个杀人魔王，杀害了十二个无辜的麻瓜和一个巫师。两年前布菜克胆大妄为地从阿兹卡班越狱逃跑，魔法部展开了前所未有的大范围搜捕。他应该被重新抓获，送回到摄魂怪手里，对此我们没有一个人提出质疑。
然而真是这样吗？
最近出现了令人惊诧的新证据，证明小天狼星布莱克也许并没有犯下他因之被送进阿兹卡班的那些罪行。小诺顿区刺叶路18号的多丽丝·珀基斯说，实际上，小天狼星可能根本就不在杀人现常
“人们没有意识到，小天狼星布莱克只是一个假名。”珀基斯夫人说，“人们以为是小天狼星布莱克的那个人，实际上是胖墩子·勃德曼，是流行歌唱小组淘气妖精的领唱，约十五年前在小诺顿区教堂大厅的一次音乐会上被一个萝卜打中耳朵后，就退出了公众生活。我在报纸上看到他的照片时一眼就认了出来。所以，胖墩子不可能犯下那些罪行，因为在那一天他正好和我一起享受浪漫的烛光晚宴。我已经给魔法部部长写了信，希望他能尽快给胖墩子，又名小天狼星，彻底平反昭雪。”
哈利读完后，不敢相信地瞪着那篇文章。也许这是一个笑话，他想，也许杂志上经常刊登一些哗众取宠的笑料。他往后翻了几页，找到了关于福吉的那篇文章。
魔法部部长康奈利·福吉五年前当选部长时，曾经否认他有接管古灵阁巫师银行的打算。福吉总是一口咬定，他只想和我们的黄金保管者“和平合作”。
然而真是这样吗？
Sources close to the Minister have recently disclosed that Fudge's dearest ambition is to seize control of the goblin gold supplies and that he will not hesitate to use force if need be.
'It wouldn't be the first time, either,' said a Ministry insider. 'Cornelius "Goblin-Crusher" Fudge, that's what his friends call him. If you could hear him when he thinks no one's listening, oh, he's always talking about the goblins he's had done in; he's had them drowned, he's had them dropped off buildings, he's had them poisoned, he's had them cooked in pies . . .'
Harry did not read any further. Fudge might have many faults but Harry found it extremely hard to imagine him ordering goblins to be cooked in pies. He flicked through the rest of the magazine. Pausing every few pages, he read: an accusation that the Tutshill Tornados were winning the Quidditch League by a combination of blackmail, illegal broom-tampering and torture; an interview with a wizard who claimed to have flown to the moon on a Cleansweep Six and brought back a bag of moon frogs to prove it; and an article on ancient runes which at least explained why Luna had been reading The Quibbler upside-down. According to the magazine, if you turned the runes on their heads they revealed a spell to make your enemy's ears turn into kumquats. In fact, compared to the rest of the articles in The Quibbler, the suggestion that Sirius might really be the lead singer of The Hobgoblins was quite sensible.
与魔法部密切接触的消息提供者最近透露，福吉最强烈的野心就是控制小妖精的黄金储备，如果必要的话，他会毫不犹豫地动用武力。
“这不会是第一次，”一位魔法部内部人士说，“他的朋友们都管他叫‘妖精杀手’康奈利·福吉。但愿你能听见他在以为旁边没人时所说的话，哦，他总是在谈论他干掉的那些妖精。扔进水里淹死的，从楼上推下去摔死的，下毒药毒死的，还有做成馅饼烤熟的……”
哈利没有再读下去。福吉可能有许多缺点，但哈利觉得很难想象他会命令别人把妖精做成馅饼，这太离奇了。他翻看着杂志上其余的文章，偶尔停下来看两眼，他读到的内容有：有人指控说塔特希尔龙卷风队⑤是靠胁迫、非法对扫帚做手脚、折磨对手等手段而赢得魁地奇球俱乐部联合会杯的;对一个巫师的采访，他宣称自己骑着一把横扫六星飞到了月亮上，并带回来一袋月亮上的青蛙作为证据;还有一篇文章讲的是古代魔文，这至少解释了卢娜为什么一直颠倒着读《唱唱反调》。据杂志上说，如果你把这些古魔文颠倒过来，就能看见它们其实是一个咒语，能把你仇敌的耳朵变成金橘。实际上，跟《唱唱反调》上的其他文章比起来，那篇提出小天狼星实际上可能是淘气妖精领唱的文章还算是有点道理的。